end of school year…..big emotions
The end of the school year brings up many mixed emotions for teens and for us parents.
I have clients that are graduating high school, moving into high school, and even graduating college.
Even just ending one school year and heading to the next is a transition. I would even say these are BIG transitions!
The change of routine that is approaching from seeing school friends every day to being home for the summer can be a huge adjustment.
Many teens do not even realize the fluctuations of emotions and the many thoughts going through their mind and body. One minute they are happy and laughing and the next, tears are flowing. They go from being completely over school to becoming nostalgic and reminiscing over their favorite moments and how much they are going to miss it. One minute they are excited for the future and the next they are scared of the unknown of the next phase in their life.
This happens to us as parents as well! The range of emotions sweep in like a gust of wind. One moment I am excited about celebrating my son’s graduation and the next I am super stressed about the potential traffic. Then I am in awe watching my son hang with his friends having fun. Then I find tears streaming from my eyes because I am immensely grateful for all the amazing hockey parents that helped him along the way.
So as the school year comes to an end, and new beginnings are on the horizon, how can we best support each of our loved ones and us (for that matter).
Start with:
Awareness
Just knowing that our teens (and us) can be experiencing different ranges of emotions over the next few months is key in supporting them!
Holding Space
Be present and available for them to speak whatever is on their mind. Holding space is about listening NOT about fixing. Our teens need us to listen and be able to create a safe environment. Your teen wants to be seen and heard!
Allow
Let your teen have all the Big Emotions (and us too)!!
Do not try to “make them happy or excited” allow them to be in the feelings. This is hard for many parents. It is very uncomfortable for parents to witness our teens unhappy but it is so important as parents for us to sit in the uncomfortable emotion and allow our teens to work through it. Of course, you can let your teen know that you are available whenever they need.
As for teens,
Allow the Emotion
Feel your feelings. Feel all of them! Do not resist or suppress them.
Go for a walk outside without your airpods
Journal what you are feeling
Listen to music that fits your emotions
Have a good cry
Be Present
Enjoy the Now
Do not overthink your future or your past
There are mini miracles in the present…keep an eye out for them
Reflect
Take time to reflect and create the future you want with allowing your mind to dream.
On what you want your summer to look like. Journal your ideal summer.
On what your fall semester will look like. Journal your ideal friends, teachers, classes.
Take time to reflect and create the future you want with allowing your mind to dream.
Create affirmations that you want your future to reflect:
All is well
My new friends are super caring and fun
My roommate is amazing
Everything always works out for me
My classes are interesting and fun
This is the best summer
Create a vision board
Have fun with it!
Do this with a friend if you like
And lastly, when the Big Emotions come, allow yourself some GRACE!
It is about choosing kindness, love and compassion during this time. It is about understanding that it is normal to have your emotions fluctuate and to care for yourself and your teen through it!
If you want to process your Big Emotions with a life coach, I am here! Let’s get started. I offer 1:1 coaching. Set up time with me to see how I can best support you or your teen!
