You know I am a mama of 3 teens and most of the time my happy place is the comfort of my own home. I love it! It is warm and cozy, filled with love, and it is my teen’s home base as they are constantly in and out. I can very much be a creature of habit and totally get way too cozy and stay in the groove of my routine. Habits are easy for the brain, it doesn’t need to think, it just does.

Hence why habits are hard to break and feel really uncomfortable at times when we try something different!

It takes energy and intention to change it up…..and I am so glad I did this past weekend!! I couldn't wait to share with you that the effort and energy to plan an experience with your teen is worth it tenfold!

My daughter begged me last year to buy her tickets for a country concert. My mom brain went to….an outdoor concert, what if it rains? All those people? Tickets are pricey? The traffic, where will I park? This doesn’t sound fun at all. But when I could quiet my brain a bit and see the possibility of having fun with my daughter, it was a no brainer to go for it!!!

Friday morning, the day of the concert, those same thoughts came rearing back…..traffic, crowds, parking, I won’t get home until after midnight but again, I was able to acknowledge these thoughts but not allow them to take hold. Once I saw my daughter and her friend getting ready, all giddy and excited, I allowed myself to immerse into all of it!!

I quickly got ready and we headed off to have the time of our lives. We blasted the playlist of the concert in the car on the way there, we manifested the most amazing parking spot, barely hit any traffic, and had plenty of time to get our merch!!!

During the concert we danced, we took pics, we sang every word (if I knew them), and we had the best time ever!!! It felt so awesome to allow myself not to worry about anything, to be in the moment, to enjoy the smiles on the girls faces, to listen to them sing their hearts out, and enjoy the amazing performance! It felt good to act like a teen again!

It felt good to act like a teen again!

I am here to remind you that teens will be teens! Their prefrontal cortex doesn’t fully mature until the mid- 20”s. This is the part of the brain that is responsible for decision-making, impulse control, and judgment. So of course, they make some stupid mistakes and I mean some really stupid mistakes. I am not saying consequences for these actions should be dismissed but what I am saying is that we can offer our teens grace as they figure out this teen thing. Being a teen is hard and knowing this, we can offer them some grace, compassion, and extra love!

We all make mistakes. We all do things we wish we could have done differently. We can learn from our mistakes, but we are not supposed to keep them in the forefront of our mind.

The ONE SHIFT I want to offer that will connect you with your teen is to see the good!

Our Teens are TRULY AMAZING!

Remember the things they are doing well and DO NOT DWELL on what they didn’t. Dwell on the times they succeeded! The times they melted your heart and the times you glanced at them while they were sleeping and saw how peaceful they are. Look back on when half their clothes made it in the hamper, the time you asked them to do something and they did without complaining, and the amount of times they drove the car and came home safe. You can totally reminisce on all the days they showed up to school and did all the things!!!

Our teens are amazing!! Truly AMAZING!

Focus on the goodness and I promise you, the connection you desire with multiply!

You have the power to let your relationship with your teen flourish!

Our teens need us to do the inner work, the more that we work on our mind, the more you create the relationship you want with your teen. Let me support you to build the future you want with your teen.

I am here to support you with the work to build a deep connection with yourself and your teen.

It is never too late to start! I offer 1:1 life coaching sessions to help you build the life you truly desire for yourself and family. Let’s get started!

My goal is to help facilitate true connection between you and your teen! We all want to be seen and heard and I know that our teens need us more now than ever. Most of them don’t even realize it or don’t have the words to voice it but there is this underlying disconnect that they need us to help rebuild the bridge of connection.

I have one way that has been super helpful in guiding my thoughts back to goodness and I want to share with you!!!

It is this notion of: What channel are you tuned to?

As humans, our thoughts naturally gravitate towards the negative. Our minds are powerful. We have to understand what channel we are watching?

Are you playing back old memories of past mistakes or wrong doing your teen made?

Are you playing back the hurtful words said between the two of you?

Are you ruminating on some sad event when you weren’t treated right or something unfair happened?

Before you know it, you are feeling sad, resentment, discouraged, and lack of motivation to connect with your teen. I say………CHANGE THE CHANNEL!

Stop landing on the same miserable past, and focus on the GOODNESS Channel.

The goodness channel has memories of you and your teen experiencing so much good!

Do you feel the shift in your relationship with your teen? The shift where they start to spend more time without you.  When friends are a priority. The xbox is winning their time. Your teen's first boyfriend or girlfriend has them on FaceTime...ALL THE TIME. No matter what you do, you are seeing them less and less.  Boy, it sucks.  

Our logical brain can see it: we see our teens growing and evolving. We are happy that they want to hang out with friends, that they want to be social on the weekends. Then our thoughts get in the way and we start spiraling, thinking our teens will never need us and they don’t want to spend any time with us.  

What if I told you that your teens want to spend the majority of time with friends or on their xbox BUT they also want to spend time with you!!!! 

The key to spending quality time with your teen is understanding what energy are you bringing to the relationship with your teen.   

So many of my teen clients complain how much their parents are always nagging them to do something.  What type of energy are you showing up with your teen?

Are you in “needy” energy?Are you in “grapsy” energy?Are you “controlling” energy?  

We all have been here, craving our teens' attention and time. We love our teens and want to spend time with them but if you want to build lasting connection with them we need to shift our energy out of graspy, needy, and controlling energy for their attention

Coming from these energies doesn’t work if you want a lasting and real relationship with your teen.

HERE IS WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW

You are NOT being replaced! It is impossible to replace you.

What your teen is doing is totally normal and is supposed to be doing this. As parents, we have to come from open energy and allow them the time and space to grow. As parents, we have to continue doing what we love to do, and invite our teens to do it. If they say no, then do it anyway. It is a perfect time to rediscover your joys and what makes you happy. Start doing them and your teen may or may not join you.

For me, I love my afternoon walks with my dog. Each day as I am heading out the door, I ask my teens if they would like to join. For weeks/months, I would get no takers. Then eventually, one, two, or all three teens would join me, depending on the day and their mood….hehe. Each day, I continued to enjoy my walk and ask my teens. Now, one of my teens asks me each day, what time is our walk? It is my most favorite time of the day!!!! This happened naturally, not from a graspy, controlling or needy way. From a: I am heading out and would love for you to join, but if not totally ok. I use this same energy, with watching my favorite series or heading out to dinner with my hubby. If they join, yay, if not, I am still going to have a wonderful time.

Remember, your teen loves you and needs you. It is our job to create a loving, open energy for them to feel loved, safe, and welcomed!!!

I know building trust with my teens is crucial in staying connected with them. Sometimes it is easier said then done.

I am over here in the midst of “trying to loosen my grip” and trust my teen as she wants to be way more social than my older teens ever were. This is something new I am experiencing and I wanted to share my thoughts and how I am working through this with my teen in hopes to help if you are experiencing something similar. My goal is to develop a trusting relationship with my teen. Navigating my thoughts is key in reaching my goal.

Building trust requires time, effort, and commitment from us and our teens.

I grew up with parents that I perceived as strict when it came to going out on weekends. I was told only bad things happen when a group of teenagers get together. I was permitted to go out one night a weekend and the details of where I was going was of course a must. I adopted the thought: only bad things happen when teens get together. So I can now see why my first response when my teen wants to go out with a bunch of friends is a big fat NO.

My uneasiness comes from my thought: Only bad things happen when teens get together.

A big part of being a teen is learning about relationships!

Some questions that we reflect on during my coaching sessions are:

How do I show up when I am in a relationship? How am I being treated? What does an ideal relationship look like to me? How do I show up in friendships different from romantic relationships? Why?

I teach teens that relationships are simply our thoughts about another person. Relationships are thoughts!!!! The good news is that once we grasp that our thoughts create how we feel, it is a game changer for us!!

I talk to my teens about being intentional with what they are thinking. We must manage the brain or our brain will take over and provide us with a ton of rubbish, negative thoughts. We need to spend intentional time loving, encouraging, and acknowledging ourselves. It is so much more fun than the alternative!!

It is important to focus on your relationship with yourself. How you treat you is how others will treat you!

Your relationship with yourself is based on your thoughts about YOU!! How you treat yourself reflects your thoughts about yourself. Having an awesome relationship with yourself is simply a commitment to think amazing things about yourself!

The start of the new year and winter season is a wonderful time to set intentions and get crystal clear on WHAT YOU WANT. I know we all want a deeper parent-teen connection. Last week we spent time tapping into what your ideal life looks like with using manifestation. This week we will focus on the relationship with your teen

Building a strong and positive relationship with your teenager is crucial for their emotional well-being and overall development. Manifestation, the practice of bringing positive energy and intention into your life, can be a powerful tool in fostering a deeper connection with your teen.

Let’s explore practical tips on how to manifest the relationship you want with your teenager.

LET"S GOOOOO!!!!

Set Clear Intentions

Practice Listening

Visualize Positive Interactions

Create Quality Time

Be a Positive Role Model

Celebrate Milestones

January is a perfect month to cozy up on the couch and start manifesting!!!

The start of the new year and winter season is a wonderful time to set intentions and get crystal clear on WHAT YOU WANT. Last week we spent time creating a manifestation list of all that you desire. This week we are going to tap into what your ideal life looks like.

You get to decide where you are going and the energy you want to be from this moment forward.

Manifesting is the act of bringing a tangible desire or goal into reality, by putting intentional energy into bringing these desires to life.

IT IS TIME TO CLAIM IT

It is time to get crystal clear on what you want. Only you know what it is you desire. No need to set timelines on your goals or desires. Just let the ideas flow in your journal and get very clear on what you want your life to look like.

This month is all about dreaming, planting seeds, and claiming where you are going

One of my biggest manifestations was about five years ago. I was working full time outside the home with a long commute. I would walk in the door after picking up the kids from aftercare and start with the dinner, bath, and then bed routine. I was constantly on the go until I hit my bed each night. I felt disconnected to my family and had zero time for myself. I was a task master and checked everything off my to do list.

I remember getting crystal clear that year, wanting to work from home but have the ability to still work with others. I liked being with people but did not like the typical 9-5 hours with an hour commute each way. I dreamed of having a chef to cook healthy meals for the family.

Now, of course, I had no idea HOW this would happen, but I claimed my intentions because I really wanted to spend more time with my family and thought if I could free up my commute time and not have to make a meal, it would afford me hours of family time!!!

I practiced visualizing my new life, working and collaborating with people, spending more time with my family, taking more care of myself. I would feel energized, happy, and a huge sense of freedom!!

About a year later, an amazing opportunity came my way!! One that I could never have imagined. It was a job to live on a school campus and work in the health center. I would actually have NO commute but would be working with others! And one of the perks of living on campus is that my family and I would have access to the dining hall for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. WHAT!!!! Literally a chef, cooking my meals for me and my family. This is when I became a full on believer that I can create the life of my dreams!!!

I would have never in a million years been able to experience this manifestation if I did not get crystal clear on what I wanted. This is why I want you to take time this month spending time dreaming and asking for what it is you want. Be open to the possibility.

I am a total sucker for all the New Year Feels!

I love new beginnings, fresh starts, a clean slate..... I love the feeling of newness and change! Maybe it's because I just hibernated for the last two weeks and now I am wide awake and ready to receive all the goodness 2024 is going to deliver! My soul needed rest and I am thankful that I had two weeks off and was able to spend quality time with family and had plenty of time to rest and rejuvenate.

I want to take the month of January (one of my most favorite months) and share insight on all things Manifestation. I am absolutely obsessed with manifesting and have been teaching my clients bits and pieces of my process for years and now want to expand and share with all of you!!

Roxie Malfousi states what manifestation is perfectly:

Manifesting is about becoming so empowered and full of self belief that you make things happen. It is taking empowered action towards your dreams.

Manifesting is not just sitting and dreaming of what you want. You have to take aligned action towards it.

January is a perfect month for Intention Setting.

Intention setting is the first step in the manifestation process. It is about getting crystal clear on what YOU want, and on who you are becoming! Getting clear on what you want helps you achieve it.

Intentions are POWERFUL

When you claim something, you are essentially planting the seeds for it to grow. Deciding where you want to go is the most important step in this manifestation process.

Writing down your goals significantly improves your chances of achieving them.

Get out a pen and paper and start brainstorming all the things you want in your life.

Studies show that anywhere from 50-80% of people who have their goals written down, achieve them. Only 10% of people who are not writing their goals down achieve them.

This month is all about dreaming, planting seeds, and claiming where you are going

This week as we continue to prioritize a generous spirit, we will focus on using our natural gifts and talents to serve others! How fun is this!!

In our society, we often emphasize individual success and achievement, the true beauty lies in the act of generosity! We all possess unique natural talents and gifts, and when we choose to share them with others, we not only enrich their lives but also contribute to a more compassionate and interconnected society! Wooohooo!

This week we will explore the power of being generous with your innate abilities and how it can create a ripple effect of positivity in those around us.

Let’s begin by reflecting on your own strengths and abilities. What comes naturally to you? Whether it's a talent for writing, a knack for problem-solving, an organizing master, or a gift for making others feel seen and heard, acknowledging your unique skills is the first step toward embracing generosity!!! Each and everyone of us were born with God given gifts, sometimes we just need to take time to re-discover what they are.

Next, dive into the joy that comes from sharing your gifts. When you give freely of your talents, you not only uplift others but also experience a profound sense of fulfillment and purpose.

By sharing your talents, you create a sense of unity and collaboration which builds meaningful connections. And as humans, we all crave being seen, heard, and connected!

To support our generous spirit this week I recommend journaling daily and repeating the affirmation. These are simple but effective ways to help with our monthly intention.